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    June 27

    answers to my........

    answers to my .............
    Current mood: grateful

    and here come my anwswers! God is always quick to answer me! Horrendous day yesterday, but I`m gettin up and slogging on, thank*you Jesus for hearing!                                        June 27, 2007

    ADJUSTMENTS
    by Charles R. Swindoll

    James 1

    Ever made a mental list of things that irritate you? Here are a few I've got on mine: traffic jams, long lines, misplaced keys, stuck zippers, interruptions, late planes, squeaking doors, incompetence, and flat tires.

    One of these days it should dawn on us that we'll never be completely free of irritations as long as we are on this planet. Never. Upon coming to this profound conclusion, we would then be wise to consider an alternative to losing our cool. The secret is adjusting.

    Sounds simple . . . but it isn't. Several things tend to keep us on the edge of irritability. For one thing, we develop habit reactions, wrong though they may be. Also, we're usually in a hurry—impatient. Add to that the fact that our daily expectations are unrealistic; there's no way we can possibly get it all done anyway. All this increases the level of pressure within us. And when you increase the heat to our highly pressurized system by a fiery irritation or two (or three) . . . BOOM! Off goes the lid and out comes the steam.

    When it comes to irritations, I've found that it helps if I remember that I am not in charge of my day . . . God is. And while I'm sure He wants me to use my time wisely, He is more concerned with the development of my character and the cultivation of the qualities that make me Christlike within. One of His preferred methods of training is through adjustments to irritations.

    A perfect illustration? The oyster and its pearl. An irritation occurs when the shell of the oyster is invaded by an alien substance—like a grain of sand. When that happens, all the resources within the tiny, sensitive oyster rush to the irritated spot and begin to release healing fluids that otherwise would have remained dormant. By and by the irritant is covered—by a pearl. Had there been no irritating interruption, there could have been no pearl.

    No wonder our heavenly home has pearly gates to welcome the wounded and bruised who have responded correctly to the sting of irritations.

    J. B. Phillips must have realized this as he paraphrased James 1:2-4: "When all kinds of trials and temptations crowd into your lives, my brothers, don't resent them as intruders, but welcome them as friends! Realise that they come to test your faith and to produce in you the quality of endurance. But let the process go on until that endurance is fully developed, and you will find you have become men [and women] of mature character."

    How many pearls have you made this week?

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    June 26

    meltdown..........

    melt down
    well............another melt down.............another tantrum.............just some help, just a glimmer just...........another back problem.....so hard to walk......so hard to breathe..........but still have to take care of business. Showers , teeth, hair, laundry, breakfast, cleanup, making beds............no excuses have I just keep going it seems. Kids have to be on a schedule otherwise chaos ensues! I have a difficult time with one child just trying to teach to grow up....be responsible...its not all that bad growing up, there are some perks..........its hard but if you don`t your going to look pretty ugly in diapers!  I have said no more yelling and screaming on my part! LASTED maybe .............all of 24 hrs. It gets harder and harder to get back up and continue to do the right thing keeping God at the forefront and making my decisions according to what God would have me do. When I take a breather and get out of the house I get my break an a deep breath and can look back at what happen and try another way to push the child the way they need to go. I got a call from Mr Bill Ronning at the family life radio http://www.myflr.org/ and I couldn`t think of what to say! I listen to this station from 7 am to 5 pm m-f   it`s like being in church[home] and I feel comforted and learn about God! well it looks like time to make dinner and it may take alittle longer so I can move slower but at least I have God!
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    June 21

    mercy...............I have

    When I have one of my days which happens more frequently now I find God speaks to me thru christian songs * a sermon on the internet * the Bible* prayer* it seems my pity parties are geting less and less..........I sometimes feel this is all I can handle and God brings me back to his way of thinking! It`s so good to have guidance and direction in my life! Thank*you God* thank*you Jesus.........................................................June 21, 2007 

    GOD’S SHEEPDOGS
    by Charles R. Swindoll

    Psalm 32

    The words of Psalm 23 are very familiar to all of us. Yet, unless we read that psalm through the eyes of a sheep, we will miss its magnificent message. Remember how it concludes? “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever” (KJV).

    Think of goodness and mercy as God’s sheepdogs. They stay with us, close by our side, “all the days of our lives.” And what helpful companions they are!

    The ancient Hebrews had one word they used most often for mercy: chesed, pronounced “kesed.” It is frequently translated “kindness” and “lovingkindness.” While grazing through the Old Testament this past week, I found no less than five different “miseries” to which mercy brings needed relief.

    When we’re suffering the pain of unfair and unjust consequences (Gen. 39:21-23). Joseph, when dumped into a dungeon because of a false accusation, was given chesed—divine relief. It relieved him of the misery of bitterness, the companion of unfair treatment.

    When we’re enduring the grief of a death (Ruth 1:8-9). Shortly after the premature deaths of her sons, Naomi asks the Lord to grant her grieving daughters-in-law chesed. God not only gives “dying grace,” He also provides “grieving mercy,” which relieves us of the misery of anger in the backwash of our accepting the loss of a loved one.

    When we’re struggling with the limitations of a handicap (2 Sam. 9). David extended chesed to Mephibosheth, the crippled son of Jonathan, and provided him a place at the king’s table for the rest of his days. Mercy relieves the misery of self-pity that often accompanies a handicap.

    When we are hurting physically (Job 10:12). The Lord gave chesed to Job, which strengthened him to go on during his days of intense pain. Divine relief removes the misery of hopelessness that would otherwise overwhelm us in times of great affliction.

    When we are under a cloud of guilt after we have committed a transgression. Psalms 32 and 51 both speak of David’s gratitude for chesed after the Bathsheba affair. His sin was not only forgiven, his guilt was taken away. In His mercy and lovingkindness, God relieves the misery of guilt . . . the lingering sting of wrongdoing.

    No unfair consequence is too extreme for mercy. No grief too deep. No handicap too debilitating. No pain too excruciating. No sin too shameful.

    Sheep are often in need, so mercy, our faithful companion, stays near.

    “There’s a wideness in God’s mercy, like the wideness of the sea” (Frederick W. Faber

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    June 19

    wheelchair pushin....

    wheelchair pushin
    I had to write about Father`s Day! Went to JC Penneys to look for cologne and we had the usual bickering and fightin in the back seat me in the front with the wooden spoon poised  and ready to smack........I hate that but the screaming and cussing is worse I think! anyways Eddie`s pushing the wheelchair in and I keep telling everybody I can do it. I don`t know why it is but cooking cleaning bathrooms I pretty much do it all without anyone offering but the minute I`m in the wheelchair everyone wants to push. I am so grateful for any help I get BUT I lose whatever control is left in my life and have to go wherever the pushee wants to go. Jaylee got ahold and was running real fast pushin............I ended up halfway under the display table........Jaron likes to push me on his skateboard at the park.............I gotta say its like walking without help. It`s just a  matter of time before I fall.  I remember a few years ago I was at the park and using the wheelchair and a 3 year old said to his mom "thats a big baby stroller" I smile about it now but was I so ashamed and went and sat back  in the car.  It could be worse.......I could just not care where I go or want to see new things........I could just give up..............I`m not there yet! Thank*you Jesus for being there!                                              and Jaron thanks for thinking of me , moving the wheelchair...........sometimes you are listening mom loves you!
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    June 16

    Father`s Day..love you Dad, Thank*you

     I had to post this for Father`s Day ...I have my own memories........biking............dune buggy riding...........mud sliding lol.....tag football............memories of my childhood............make wonderful memories for your kids, it only happens once in your life and stuff happens so live-run-jump- it could all go away just like that, no regrets**********************************June 16, 2007 

    A GIFT FOR DAD
    by Charles R. Swindoll

     Proverbs 13

    In an age of equal rights and equal time, it seems only fair to give dads equal attention. Sometimes it seems the only time that happens is during the big commercial buildup for Father’s Day, and then it’s all buy, buy, buy! Families wonder whether to wrap us in robes, fill us with food, surprise us with skis, tickle us with tools, or just cover us with kisses. If I know dads, most of ’em blush no matter what you do. They are so used to providing, receiving is a little weird.

    For the next several minutes, think about your father, okay? Meditate on what that one individual has contributed. Think about his influence over you, his investment in you, his insights to you. Feel his hand wrapped around yours . . . his strong, secure arm across your shoulders. Remember his grip that once communicated a balanced mixture of gentleness and determination . . . compassion and masculinity . . . not only his “I understand” but also his “Now, straighten up!”

    Best of all, take time to recall his exemplary character. The word is “integrity.” Pause and remind yourself of just one or two choice moments in your past when he stood alone . . . when he stood by you . . . when he stood against insurmountable odds . . . when he provided that shelter in your time of storm . . . when he protected you from the bitter blast of life’s harsh consequences.

    In the wake of such a legacy, which time can never erase, give God thanks. Thank the Giver of every good and perfect gift for the meaningful marks your dad has branded on the core of your character . . . the wholesome habits he has woven into the fabric of your flesh. While meandering through this forest of nostalgia, stop at the great oak named Proverbs and reflect upon the words the wise man carved into its bark long centuries ago: “A righteous man who walks in his integrity—How blessed are his sons [and daughters] after him” (20:7).

    How very true! How blessed you are!

    Dad is not perfect; he would be the first to admit it. Nor is he infallible, much to his own disappointment. Nor altogether fair . . . nor always right. But there’s one thing he is—always—he is your dad . . . the only one you’ll ever have. Take it from me, there’s only one thing he needs on Father’s Day. Plain and simple, he needs to hear you say, “Dad, I love you.”

    That’s the best gift you can give. Nothing you can buy will bring him anywhere near the satisfaction that four-word gift will provide. “Dad, I love you.”

    Look your dad in the eye or call him on the phone and give him the gift he needs more than anything. Give him your love.

     

    Taken from Charles R. Swindoll, Day by Day with Charles Swindoll (Nashville: W Publishing Group, 2000). Copyright © 2000 by Charles R. Swindoll, Inc. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

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    June 11

    don`t poke the bear

    I woke up this morning and taking a shower this sentence came to mind when I was praying. Last night my daughter was in bed ready to sleep and my husband came to say good-night to her[she sleeps in our bed, another sorespot for him..] and he told her not to be afraid of ........and she said........Jesus is with her always..coulda knocked me over, she`s listening praise God!!!!!! I was so proud of her! anyways my husband rolled his eyes punched my arm and said , do you see what your doing? your gettin out of control! Jesus Freak! born again, I always think we are on the same page and am always reminded he has not made the commitment.....so I pray he comes to Jesus but in the meantime I have to be careful not to poke the bear! Please Jesus, thank-you so much for all your blessings[Jaylee is listening!!!] please give me strong feet and knees not to bend!!I love you Amen!
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    June 06

    the onlinechaplain

    I frequently find people who walk with Jesus closely who glorify God by there everyday  lives. It is great to hear of people who are strong in Christ have the same issues as I do. I see making you a strong person in Christ is to not let go..don`t give up..........hang on with all of your heart.                                  Writer's Block" from "The Online Chaplain"

    Writer's Block

    WRITERS BLOCK.  I never knew what this means until recently.  Now, I got it.  In fact, when you look it up in the dictionary it probably has a picture of me.  I can not count how many times I have sat down to write something and after an eternity of mental hoops sat back and said, "Got Nothing."  So, instead of sitting here whining about how I am letting my blog readers down I decided to write about it. 

    The "writers block" hasn't been completely unfruitful.  I have heard from readers on four continents to date.  "Chaplain, you OK?"  I didn't know there were so many people paying attention.  Made me feel good.

    To answer the question, "Yeah, I am OK?"  In fact, I am better than Ok.  We are in the bottom of the ninth inning and my team here in Iraq is hitting the ball consistently.  I have the had the joy of watching leaders mature and temper their God-given strength with compassion, understanding and charity.  We are bringing America a gift when we return.  Young soldiers, battle hardened, tough, capable with a deep understanding of self-sacrifice.  I am proud to have been a part of it.

    But, the fact remains I have now been deployed for 561 days.  Most of those days have been in combat.   My get up and go has "gotten up and left."  I am now officially tired "from the inside out."   It is showing up in "writers block."  There are other symptoms too.  I have "stupid crap block".  When I see "stupid crap" I want to "knock the crap" out of some "stupid crap."  Thus, "stupid crap block."   

    I have spent the month analyzing this phenomenon.  Here is what I have come up with.  This is familiar ground.  I hear about it all the time.  The mother in Minnesota who has spent the last 21 months giving birth to her third child, caring for her toddler, and getting her five year old ready for kindergarten, what does she have?  Diaper block?  Or, how about the person who every day gets up and goes and faithfully does the job they hate.  What do they have?  Employment block?

    Not only do I hear about it all the time.  I have been here many times before.  I remember enough about the past twenty years to remember this.  I have been tired before.  I know what happens, now.  It has happened every single time, without fail in my life.  It is one of the constants. It's coming and I can see it on the horizon.  REST

    I am not the only one who needs to rest, and I refuse to internalize the symptoms of war, compassion fatigue, or think that my "give a crap" o-meter is somehow eternally misaligned.  Bottom line is simple: I'm tired.  Perhaps, you are too.  So, hear the word of the Lord in simple, straight up terms.  It is neither, difficult or complicated.  It is simple.  "Come unto me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest."

    As I write this it is 2200 (10:00PM) the sun has set one more time and I am sitting on my deck smoking a cigar.  And I feel better than I did an hour ago.  Guess what I feel?  REST!  I pray you do too.  If not now, soon!  It will come.  Trust the promise.

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    June 04

    hanging on...

    hanging on.....
    This came to my mailbox today and seemed revelant to what I am going thru. I am numb sometimes when falls occur or I get sick, and I just wonder is it me ? what am I doing wrong? but I think these are all trials that believers go thru and hanging on strengthens you. I know getting up over and over is so so hard but I am less emotional about  why this happening and put one foot in front of the other......until........................................................................................      Faith Tested by the Elements
    Today's devotional is brought to you by Dr. Chuck Betters,     "In His Grip"

    Dear Friend,

    "What can I do with you, Ephraim? What can I do with you, Judah? Your love is like the morning mist, like the early dew that disappears.     Hosea 6:4

    I love the refreshing feeling of a cool summer morning, especially after days or even weeks of draught and intense heat. I especially enjoy the smell of hay-like grass that has been dampened by the dew of an early morning mist. I sometimes stand there with hose in hand attempting to quench the thirst of a lawn that a few weeks earlier was a lush carpet of green but has been burned up and hardened by the unrelenting rays of a merciless sun. I know full well as I squirt the hose the elements are laughing at my attempt to recapture what was in the spring. It only takes a few minutes for the dew to dissipate, the heat to intensify, and the hardened soil to chase me back into the house as I submit to the inevitable - another day of scorching heat and burned up grass. I ignore the weather man's advice to not waste my time unless I am prepared to spend several hours with that hose in hand. I know full well that those few minutes of looking like a lawn sprinkler are actually doing even greater damage to the hibernating grass. I must be prepared to give the lawn a good soaking, not just once, but throughout the dry spell. Otherwise I am wasting my time in futility.

    God uses that same picture to compare with the love the church (Ephraim and Judah) has for Him. Is your love for Christ tempered by the same characteristics of emotion-driven faith, or a feel good religion that soon fades in the heat of the day? How quickly does the thrill of a spring-like experience of the presence of God fade into the oblivion of a cracked soil hardened by the pain of life in a broken world? It does not take long for us to realize that faith gauged by mere emotion will not stand the scrutiny of life's more difficult challenges. We do not often feel like doing the right thing, especially if the right thing to do is the hard thing. There must be a consistent discipline of watering the lawn of our sin-parched souls with the love of Christ. Our faith must be tested by the elements. It is when we are tested that our roots are deepened. At times we spiritually hibernate and bear the sorrow of disappointment and doubt. But the life is still there. The soul may be scorched for a season but the Spirit of God remains true and faithful to His promises. The spring of living water who is Christ will quicken a weary faith in the midst of intense moments of doubt. We may be left with some bare spots and weeds the enemy has sown. But such are the seasonal and station of life challenges we all face.

    There are unwelcome moments of life you and I wish we could escape. In fact, that may describe your life today! When these trials come, how do you respond? How do you respond when the hurt is real or when you feel that the walls are closing in? How do you respond when things happen totally outside of your control? Those trials can, in fact, be a tremendous blessing in your life. Read some sound Biblical direction...and some words of encouragement. "The Blessings of Trials: How God Uses Trials in Your Life for Your Good" Dr. Michael Youssef, LEADING THE WAY

    Sometimes we will whine a little about how hard it is to be a Christian. But maybe we need to stop for a moment and consider our experience in comparison to that of Polycarp's, the A.D. 155 pastor of the church in Smyrna. Perhaps then we will understand what persecution really is. Jesus said, "A servant is not greater than his master. If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you" (John 15:20). If you are living a godly life, then you will be persecuted in some way, shape or form. But persecution can actually help you grow stronger spiritually. "The Promise of Persecution" Greg Laurie, A NEW BEGINNING

    The Christian life is a journey of persistence - an adventure, even, because we do not know what each day will bring as it is filled with unexpected twists and turns. One minute you're making ground, and the next minute you're falling back, losing precious progress. How can we find the constancy needed in a life where two steps forward and one step back is more the rule than the exception? "Two Steps Forward, One Step Back: The Persistent Christian Journey" David Jeremiah, TURNING POINT May the Lord richly bless you!
    The Oneplace.com Team
    http://www.oneplace.com
    Listen for Life!

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    June 02

    am i

    here i am
    Well lets see........last weekend  Memorial day was pretty good. Gettin thru the flu and  falls and toothaches was pretty painful. Eddie helped alot by allowing me to take it easy and cooking a few meals for me. We had our 24th anniversary on monday......Aidan`s birthday 2 years.....Eddie took a few days off work last thursday friday and tuesday. He did a little bonding with the kids and yelling....but all in all it was pretty good. Jaylee started swimming classes and Eddie took her the first day on tuesday! She has to wear her "baby" suit I just think that is so funny..........anyways Jaron has been helping me to get the wheelchair out so I can get her to swimming class. He is so angry and short tempered with Jelly and I. I appreciate the help but I would rather do it myself than imposing on him. It was hectic yesterday cleaning swim lessons and a trip to the dentist, at least the toothache is gone just the 500.00 headache to pay off. My knee is still killing me and am tired of taking motrin so I can get some sleep, at least it isn`t as bad as last week. I`m still praying for changes, I wonder when......time to make dinner......byebye.
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