Well today I got a jump on grocery shopping and ended up at the swap meet Friday. My husband drove everywhere, since my mishap…..over a year ago driving and leaving the house by myself I have not been able too. Incidences seem to have kept me from my goal of doing daily stuff “by myself”. The last being the garage door broke so it has to be manually lifted, and another wheelchair. Eddie got another wheel chair thru United Way last week! Thanks so much United Way!!. Being out is like being in Disneyland….so much to do and see. Sometimes though it is really ….Eddie says I read the Bible too much and I guess I am surprised to see thru God’s eyes. Case in point the advertisements on billboards suggesting…..luxury cars expensive wheels video players going, loud music systems…with very young people driving talking on a phone looking very hip and cool. Not that there is anything wrong with that but, it was something you worked for and did not usually achieve that much until 40-50. I feel really really old! I am always thinking back a scant 2-3 years ago I use to do all that…..going to stores, grocery shopping with coupons, driving to the park…..it is a huge loss because I enjoyed some of that “coming and going flurry“….and having kids who need me to be apart of life…..oh well…….at the swap meet I was able to identify where people came from because the swap meet seems to host a so many different ethnic minorities….. Peoples nationality’s have changed dramatically, vendors are selling many different items corresponding to the country where they are from, but one in particular made me do a double take. There was a “jesus” statue about 3 ft tall in front of the storefront with 4-5 other statues of “mary” and “jesus’ on the cross and some people I couldn’t identify….anyways the “jesus” statue had a dollar in its mouth and candles lit….what possible religion could that be? These icons were set up as altars….Jaylee was looking at them and identified “jesus” on the cross. I had to tell her this is NOT about Jesus. I looked around at the people congregating and decided it was time to keep moving. Down another area their were Christians handing out 1 million dollar bills with the 10 commandments. Like Ray Comfort uses the 10 commandments to evangelize on the street. Jaron took the bill handed too him and told me about it……..I wanted to stop and listen, to talk to the evangelizers but he kept pushing the wheelchair not wanting to hear anything, I kept turning around trying to get a look. That is where a wheelchair is UNBEARABLE to me…I have no choice but to go where “they” want to go. Sometimes “the pushee” will walk away and leave me in the middle of the aisle or let go and I don’t know……sometimes Jaylee will push and not tell me….I know because she puts her head down and runs……….it is only funny after I am in the car safe and leaving. She has pushed me under a display, knocked displays over, ran into other people or run into walls. I can still use my feet to guide and push along with my arms but for some reason I get to carry items purchased or bags or coats and receipts or Jaylee will hitch a ride……using one arm and one foot tires me pretty quickly. I was really disappointed not being able to talk to other Christians and listen to what they had to say. At least on the computer I have a lot more freedom to talk listen read…Christian radio hearing, at least I can surround myself with the things of Jesus. I also won a pair of sneakers thru green-label gear promotion thru mountain dew. I had been praying for certain things, the wheelchair and then I won the shoes. I thought maybe God was telling me to get up and walk! There was a snafu with the shoes and they are sending me a gift card instead which is wonderful so that I can get jelly a pair of shoes, woohoo! At the swap I saw people in wheelchairs …and older lady drinking a beer and smoking a cigarette……she seem to be enjoying herself…..the kids in strollers would go by……now I know how they feel…. All in all I did enjoy going but the view from where I sit…..people shouldn’t be wearing tight clothes when you are carrying extra love handles, no matter what your age! Church Sunday, way to go Pastor David! “who has your heart?” Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

~ Proverbs 4:23 Until Jesus has your heart, you don’t have Jesus. This song kept going round and round in my head      Use to be when I would want to hear about Jesus turn on the TV…….now my radio is on all day Dr Vernon McGee, Greg Laurie, Charles Stanley, Allistar Begg, R.C Sproul, Focus on the family, John Macarthur ..the list goes on and on. But every day I am so loved by God I get to start every day getting to know Jesus. Reading my Bible every day allows me to sit at the feet of Jesus and learn. Sometimes there are so many truths coming at me fast and furious so hard to soak it all up. Listening to

Well here it is Labor Day and completely forgot about MDA…..I had a little “daydream” a couple of weeks ago, reading my Bible and listening to a teaching…..I seem to just go into lala land some people would say a “brain fart” …..I have been watching too many vids on “farting in public” with Jaylee ….I can’t stop laughing and neither can she!! Anyways I saw me getting up from my wheelchair “gracefully” I haven’t moved like that in years……getting up grabbing on to something real sturdy 2 hands knees locked and I catapult out of the chair!!….so anyways that “vision” was startling…..couple days ago looking outside being melancholy it occurred to me being a mom involved, driving, working, cooking and cleaning, yard work , church, school, dental DR teacher appts grocery stores……all my struggles would be gone so I wished and wished to be a regular mom …….MDA has helped me, my wheelchair I sit in now, they have provided…..watching the babies and little kids struggle and what’s ahead in their life…..I pray that God grants a cure so the little ones can walk, run. Sit up, breathe, …..money is difficult to come by for parents who care for their kids, many need to have medical equipment ……..I very rarely see kids in electric wheelchairs in stores….you need a lift to get into the car …poles, hand grips, leg braces, medications, ramps…every disease requires different equipment and different stages of the disease and growth of the body…it is never-ending…..MDA provides some equipment and maybe a cure…..My disease Friedreich’s Ataxia is one of the diseases MDA is trying to cure ………….so help these little ones who wish to be a regular kid, I will contribute, how about you!!           

Last weekend we took the kids to the Drs appointments…..office charges 60.00!!! Had to put it on visa for goodness sakes……10 or more years ago Eddie and I quit smoking…25 years of addiction……we stopped because we had to put 2 cartons totaling 50.00 on visa….we could not afford to smoke. I remember at the time clutching my Grandmothers rosary beads {my grandmother quit smoking after 50 years and I thought they were magic] in my hand and praying……the first week I craved ciggs every minute…the next week every 2 mins……..the next every 3 mins…..my goodness it was a slow slow process….my best friend came over and would offer me a “toke……it didn’t de-rail me from quitting! After about 4 years of not smoking I could smell smoke thru my car window and search for the culprit…..now when I smell smoke on someone or out and about, I always say a little prayer Sweet Jesus, thank you for making me walk thru every minute of my addiction….it was a hard fought battle….I don’t crave, wish…to smoke….The messages presented to me at that time on TV “God delivered me from my addictions” …..send money….you can have wealth….send money……..you can be healed….send money……….the things [miracles] of this world is what messages are coming out of “TV Christianity“ but the true miracles of God when I look back …a heart that loves….my Jaylee………being prosperous equals…..reading the Bible, learning to love….Joy, Peace, Patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control……all these character traits you learn thru trials and tribulations in life…they are earned. I always thought they were “magically bestowed” “ given” when you became a Christian!…..when I was younger I could count on the fingers of one hand friends and family who were sick or had a medical ailment……now at 50 I do not have enough fingers and toes to count people I know going thru really tough times and diseases….addictions…..theses character traits goodness kindness gentleness etc…….I recognize those fruits with many Christians online…….in their writings….their pictures…..their music……..it is such a pleasure to stroll thru spaces and find them……when I happen upon different sites it is like I have found a treasure…and I delight in reading and looking thru photographs........... In church, my church family I feel at home….sometimes its difficult to leave!! Boy did I wander….at the Drs kids ok … ..Jaylee in first, Jaron in 11th….my babies are growing up………and so am I…in Christ!